Sexual harassment at work... is it a problem for the self-employed?

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television.

On a train, why do I always end up sitting next to the woman who's eating the individual fruit pie by sucking the filling out through the hole in the middle?

I sometimes think that being widowed is God's way of telling you to come off the Pill.

People always think I hate doing interviews. I don't. I wouldn't do them if I didn't like them.

In Russia, show the least athletic aptitude and they've got you dangling off the parallel bars with a leotard full of hormones.

Radio killed variety and TV killed radio, and the internet will kill television and it will go on and on.