I have been in a youth hostel...You are put in a kitchen with seventeen venture scouts with behavioural difficulties and made to wash swedes.

Music enriches people's lives in the same way paintings and literature do. Everybody deserves that.

I wouldn't kidnap a man for sex - I'm not saying I couldn't use someone to oil the mower.

I can remember when pants were pants. You wore them for twenty years, then you cut them down for pan scrubs. Or quilts.

Well, I think there's not much of a chance for me finding somebody of my age. Gentlemen of my age are dropping down 30 years to find girlfriends.

If you behave normally, people treat you normally. It's only when you act as if you're someone special that they feel obliged to stand on ceremony.

You know daytime television? You know what it's supposed to be for? It's to keep unemployed people happy. It's supposed to stop them running to the social security demanding mad luxuries like cookers and windows.