I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing.

I work hard. The staff and crew see how much energy I put into this project, and it makes them step up.

But I understand that relationship; I understand how the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship has so many conflicts because it's so forced.

The first time onstage, a light went on. 'OK, this is my thing. I'm comfortable here. This is my thing.'

That's what they want: two women. Fellas, I think that's a bit lofty. Because, come on, think about it - if you can't satisfy that one woman, why do you want to piss off another one? Why have two angry women in the bed with you at the same time? And think about it - you know how much you hate to talk after sex, imagine having two women just nagging you to death.

Some government workers are dedicated and work hard, but most of them are just waiting to retire.

When my parents send me emails the first 3 are blank.