Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.

Texas is a great state. It's the 'Old Man River' of states. No matter who runs it or what happens to it politically, it just keeps rolling along!

You have to have a serious streak in you, or you can't see the funny side of the other fellow.

Conferences are just like the poor and the Democrats, they will always be with us.

It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

You know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.