Every guy looks in his pocket and then votes.
The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
We have killed more people celebrating our independence day than we lost fighting for it.