On prohibiting anybody from learning anything: Why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.

It's the fellow who knows when to quit that the audience wants more of.

I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.

You know, a Communist's whole life work is based on complaint of how everything is done.... So if they ever get their country running good they will defeat their own cause.

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.