The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'

The minute a thing is long and complicated, it confuses. Whoever wrote the Ten Commandments made 'em short. They may not always be kept, but they are understood.

You know, a Communist's whole life work is based on complaint of how everything is done.... So if they ever get their country running good they will defeat their own cause.

Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.

Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.

Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.