Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.

An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

Samuel Gompers has spent his life trying to keep labor from working too hard and has succeeded beyond his wildest dreams.

You have to have a serious streak in you, or you can't see the funny side of the other fellow.

In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.

One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide.

If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.