We may elevate ourselves but we should never reach so high that we would every forget those who helped us get there.

A woman can make a man feel older or younger than his years if she so chooses. Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men. Women were made with a sense of humor so they could love men instead of laughing at them.

Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.

What's considered enough money? Just a little bit more.

If you want to know when a war might be coming, you just watch the U.S. and see when it starts cutting down on its defenses. It's the surest barometer in the world.

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.

That's the trouble with our charities; we are always saving somebody away off, when the fellow next to us ain't eating.