If you eliminate the names of Lincoln, Washington, Roosevelt, Jackson and Wilson, both conventions would get out three days earlier.

It's the fellow who knows when to quit that the audience wants more of.

No nation ever had two better friends that we have. You know who they are? The Atlantic and Pacific oceans.

When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.

The problem ain't what people know. It's what people know that ain't so that's the problem.

The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back

Course, that's the trouble with politics, it breeds politics! So that makes it pretty hard to stamp out.