If you are trying to get out of the hole, stop digging.

We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.

It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.

What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.

Parades should be classed as a nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison.

When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that's Memoirs.

You have to have a serious streak in you, or you can't see the funny side of the other fellow.