Some guy invented Vitamin A out of a carrot. I'll bet he can't invent a good meal out of one.

What's considered enough money? Just a little bit more.

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.

We have the best Congress that money can buy.

There are two things I don't care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist's testimony, and the other is a railroad timetable.

The Republicans have a habit of having three bad years and one good one, and the good one always happens to be election years.

With all our crime and all our immorality ... and about as much contentment and respose as a fresh-caged hyena, we go to tell the whole world: we are the only one with the right idea!