If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.

The fellow that can only see a week ahead is always the popular fellow, for he is looking with the crowd. But the one that can see years ahead, he has a telescope but he can't make anybody believe that he has it.

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.

Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

My father was one-eighth Cherokee indian and my mother was quarter-blood Cherokee. I never got far enough in arithmetic to figure out how much injun that made me, but there's nothing of which I am more proud than my Cherokee blood.

When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.