Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is that the Democrat is a cannibal, they live off each other, while the Republicans live off the Democrats.

So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn the other fellow for doing what we are doing every day, only in a different way.

I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.

Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.

The French couldn't hate us any more unless we helped 'em out in another war.