Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

We have killed more people celebrating our independence day than we lost fighting for it.

When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds.

The good old horse-and-buggy days: then you lived until you died and not until you were run over.

In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.

When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.