A fellow who is always declaring that he's no fool, usually has his suspicions.

He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.

God help those who do not help themselves.

The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.

I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .'

Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.