I was just thinking how unfortunate it'd be to be a fat girl named Candy.

I wonder if in 2050 there will be a movie called, 'Dude, Where's My Spaceship'

I just could just shave my beard, and nobody would recognize me. Although I look like Jodie Foster.

Head gear, plus acne equals...table for one in the cafeteria.

When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.

When you're doing standup you're kind of doing, "Hey. I thought of this. This may be funny.

People get TV deals by doing something in their grandmother's basement. It is definitely the wave. Everybody is trying to do all that stuff. I mean, the Internet is the only reason that I've gotten work is because I've somehow created a line and people have seen it. And then I've been asked to auditions.