I watch a happy person doing stand-up, and I go, "What the hell is this? This person's happy!" You need internal conflict. You need the guy to be out of step with society. It's a tool for comedy.

I like dark comedies. That's why I like the Wayans Brothers.

I once walked in on my grandparents making love...And that's why I don't eat raisins.

Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious.

Hookers don't like to snuggle.

I have a 60-acre farm in North Carolina, and I have a tractor and a farmhouse. As soon as I groom the land, I want to put cabins around and have a place where people can write and hang out. It'll be either that or an all-black nudist colony.

I know my face is turning red. I don't want you to interpret it as being embarrassed. It's rage. The color of my face is rage.