My forte is awkwardness.

My brother has ADD, which is weird because he drives a Ford Focus. I told my brother that joke but he didn't laugh because he got distracted by my shoe strings.

It's not good for comedy to be like, 'Thanks for liking me'. Being popular is poison.

Element of surprise is really fun for me in comedy. I have to be surprised, and everything's been done.

I don't really have a pattern yet. I don't know if I'll develop one. As far as comedic integrity, I don't have integrity in general, comedic or otherwise.

When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.

My comfort zone is press conferences.