When I'm alone, I can sleep crossways in bed without an argument.

I'm a great housekeeper. I get divorced. I keep the house.

If I would believe what I read about myself, I would hate my guts too.

What I call loaded, I'm not. What other people call loaded I am.

To have twenty lovers in one year is easy. To have one lover for twenty years is difficult.

The only place men want depth in a woman is in her décolletage.

Husbands are like fires - they go out when unattended.