No one likes the house next door to look worse or a lot better than his own.

A great many people do not have the right to their own opinion because they don't know what they are talking about.

A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?". She doesn't care what you think.

I've learned... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

Unfortunately, propaganda works.

Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.