Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His kids.

Anyone who has brought up children knows that consistency has absolutely nothing to do with discipline.

I'm not the boss of my house. I don't know how I lost it, I don't know when I lost it, I don't really think I ever had it. But I've seen the boss's job...and I don't want it!

When you carry a gun, you mean to harm somebody, kill somebody.

If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.

When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.

Children today know more about sex than I or my father did.