How dare you have wino tell me not to do drugs.

I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. OK, not the most popular idea ever expressed. Either that or you're all real high and agreeing with me in the only way you can right now. (Starts blinking)

The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions

No one knows what it's like ... to be a dustbin ... in Shaftesbury ... with hooligans.

Folks, it's time to evolve. That's why we're troubled. You know why our institutions are failing us, the church, the state, everything's failing? It's because, um - they're no longer relevant. We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?

Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can't find your fags.

So, it's good to be here, wherever I am.