No one entertains the thought that maybe God does not believe in you.

It's not most important to communicate myself on stage as it is to be as funny or interesting as I possibly can on stage. I feel more like I'm doing a play whose main character just happens to share my name.

I think no matter what you do, a certain amount of people are going to call you a sellout, somehow, you know. If I ever start trying to make a living on it.

I just try to do things on stage that I think the audience would enjoy. And I try to draw on and add to acts that I've enjoyed watching.

Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.

The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.

My whole family thinks I'm gay, I guess it's always been that way. Maybe it's 'cause of the way that I walk, Makes them think I like... boys.