The strength of comedy is I don't have to answer to anybody but sometimes you want to learn from other people and see your ideas strengthen by other people.

I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in - and I never went.

I think the love-hate is fundamental. Everyone hates reality television, and everyone's watching it. Everyone hates Facebook, and everyone is on it.

I'm not a grown up until everybody realises I'm a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.

I masturbate 'cause I'm the only one whose standards are low enough to f-k me.

In the distance, Bo saw a fairy. A fairy so beautiful that he felt proud of being called one in highschool.

I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.