I've got magic. I've got poetry at my fingertips.

I gotta take the baton from Chuck Norris.

I've got volumes on how not to behave. I've got more information now than a guy should have at my age.

I just didn't believe I was like everybody else. I thought I was unique.

The only thing I'm addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent.

I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time - and this includes naps - I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.

I was born dead. Yeah, the umbilical cord was like, floppy baby, the whole thing. Yeah, it was bad.