There is probably more invisible tape out there than we realize.

The boomerang is Australia's chief export (and then import).

To remove all credibility from what you're saying try wearing sunglasses on your forehead.

A pipe is greater than a bong. Because when you're smoking a pipe at least it makes you look like you're thinking about something.

I've never read an article of clothing.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I travel alone so much, and the first thought is to grab the damn phone. In airports, just look around. Nobody looks at anybody, or even out the window. It's obvious we can't live without it anymore, and as a comic on the road the phone is an essential tool. It's probably doing more good than bad for me, but it does make me sad that those of us who grew up without mobile phones, we know what we're missing.