It seems that man's greatest natural enemy is the target.

It's funny: when people always talk about the importance of role models, I used to think that was so exaggerated, but as I get older, I start to realize I don't feel that way so much anymore. If you see somebody like you who's doing something, an older version of what you are, it does make you feel like it's more possible.

As a comic, I think I'm very verbally oriented about a lot of the stuff that I've written or thought up and how I say it.

If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters.

I've met a few people who were passive-aggressive, but I've never met anyone who was aggressive-passive. I don't want tacos! Maybe.

When someone describes themself as a taxpayer, they're about to be an asshole.

I never set out to do a sketch show.