It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.

To remove all credibility from what you're saying try wearing sunglasses on your forehead.

I still like paper books. Like, book is a flammable object. After you read it, you could use it to get warm. Or it could become a pile of napkins.

My family was fine, it's just a different way of going about life. Creativity was not something that was isolated and identified and valued.

There are two kinds of jackets - reversible, and reversible but it's hard to zipper up and it looks really stupid.

I'm so secretive that when someone asks me, Hey, can you keep a secret? I say That's none of your business.

Have a great day. Note: does not apply to my enemies.