It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.

I am what I eat. And I am this especially when I bite my nails.

I didn't play music, nobody in my family had an instrument or played music, we didn't even have any books at my house. I think about it and I'm like, I don't know how I climbed out of there.

One thing you never hear is "Man that guy is good at badminton".

I keep a lighter in my back pocket all the time. I'm not a smoker, I just really like certain songs.

There is probably more invisible tape out there than we realize.

How to be a bouncer: be an asshole; stand near a door.