What did you learn in school that you still use today? Go ahead teachers, tell me. What? Fear, conformity, don't question authority.

I couldn't possibly explain why the common person would be against something like that. It's all rooted in sexual hang-ups. The whole institution of marriage itself really has no place in a progressive society. I don't know why anyone would want to get married heterosexually, so why they'd be against homosexual marriage is flummoxing. I only use that word when I'm talking to someone from the British press.

How do you pledge allegiance to a government? That's all America is: a government. There's no such thing as 'we're Americans.' That's just trivial bullshit to get you rooting for the home team. You're not an American. You're a guy, you're a person, you're an individual.

I couldn't be a responsible enough parent if my kid was born with a new suit and a full-time job.

I'm in a perfect position. I don't want to be more famous and I can't lose sponsors, so I can say anything I want.

I have a picture I keep in my wallet of my father's corpse... I keep that picture in my wallet to show people who show me baby pictures.

When you consider the overpopulation in this world ... homosexuality is completely underrated in this society.