Is it cynical to assume that anyone smiling is a liar and a criminal?

The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.

The quality of a restaurant's food is inversely proportioned to the amount of fun its staff seems to be having.

I like Irish pubs, except for all the loud music and drinking, and people acting like idiots.

Space and time are figments of you're imagination, unless the guy you're flying next to won't shut up.

Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.

I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.