... it's simply wrong to always order [kids] to stop that fighting. There are times when one child is simply defending his rights and damned well should be fighting.

I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, “Never mind! I'll do it myself.

I have a theory about the human mind. A brain is a lot like a computer. It will only take so many facts, and then it will go on overload and blow up.

People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.

When you look like your passport photo, it's time to go home.

Early in my life I had made a pact with myself. I would never eat anything that moved when I cooked it, excited the dog, or inflated upon impact with my teeth.

A grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.