I listened to my first comedy album in 6th grade. It was Bill Cosby. My brother and I would play it over and over on a Fisher Price record player. A friend in high school also introduced me to Richard Pryor. I wasn't writing material back then, but I would say funny stuff. I was good at making fun of people's moms. If I knew something personal about you, it would be used against you.

You know you're getting older when your haters now want to kill you.

Valentines Day is the Super Bowl of relationships. If you're alone that night you didn't make the cut.

Why go to France when you can smell the same people in coffee shops here in America.

Wrestling is only gay when you make eye contact.

Thanksgiving is the day you don't know if you're invited for dinner or an intervention either way is going to be an ambush.

I didn't know how to grab your best material and put it together into a comedy set. I would just choose subjects and do it onstage. That's what I learned. I didn't know how to put a set together.