Frank Zappa Quotes

I think pop music has done more for oral intercourse than anything else that has ever happened, and vice versa.

The soul of our music, The Monkees' music, lies somewhere inbetween the 1 1/2 , the 2 1/2, the 3 3/4 and th giant C-major chord on the piano!

Modern music is people who can't think signing artists who can't write songs to make records for people who can't hear.

The most abundant element in the Universe is stupidity

With a tongue like a cow, she could make you go wow.

Weedly-weedly-wee, make a face, hold your guitar like it's your weenie, point it heavenward, and look like you're really doing something. Then, you get a big ovation while the smoke bombs go off, and the motorized lights in your truss twirl around.

You can bet everything will come to an end. It's going to be ugly and it's going to be a mess, and it's going to be something that somebody did in the name of God.

All the old history was written for the amusement of the ruling classes. The lower classes couldn't read, and their rulers didn't care about remembering what happened to them.

I want a hairy little Jewish Princess with a brand new nose, who knows where it goes.

Did you ever consider that LSD was really one of the most dangerous drugs ever manufactured because the people who took it turned into yuppies?

They were wearing smelly blankets, they looked like Donovan fans.

Information doesn't kill you.

The thing about drugs is this ... the Libertarians kind of have the right idea on this: Basically, their theory is that you own your own body, and the government should get out of your face. But, you also do not have the right to harm other people or to impinge on their rights or space. So, let's apply that to drugs . If you want to get wrecked, and you could afford it, and you have a place to do it where the results of your behavior can't harm another person, I don't see any reason why you shouldn't be allowed to do it.

Disco boy, no one understands, but thank the lord you still got hands.

The most important thing in art is The Frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively - because without this humble appliance, you can't know where The Art stops and The Real World begins.

I want a steamy little Jewish Princess with over-worked gums, who squeaks when she cums. I don't want no troll, I just want a Yemenite hole.

The whiskers sticking up from underneath his pancake makeup, and yet he was a beautiful lady.

People are just waiting around to get certified.

It's two o'clock in the morning, they're not going to get any nooky anyway, so this one guy and the guy with the t-shirt guy started sniffing the girls panties.