Marrying for sex is like flying to London for the free peanuts and pretzels. It's not the point of the thing, is it?

We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?

Don't pour the oil directly into my navel, pour it on my sternum and let it run down into my navel, you ignorant peasant.

He was admired for never being at a loss for words and never wasting any either.

The reason to retire is to try to avoid embarrassment; you ought to do it before people are dropping big hints. You want to be the first to come up with the idea. You don't want to wait until you trip and fall off the stage.

I love New York, and I'm drawn to a certain intensity of life, but I've just never felt like I want to escape from the Midwest. A writer lives a great deal in his own head, and so one intuitively finds places where your head is more clear. New York for me is one of those places.

Your car, comfort though it be, this little den and dining room on wheels, is a prison that deadens your senses, and to feel wholly alive you must go for a walk.