Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.
One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife.
I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.
Time wounds all heels.
If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
The Two Most Important Words In The World Are Honesty And Sincerity, If You Can Fake These You've Got It Made.