We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
We aim to please... You aim too, please.
When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.
I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed Dolly Parton was my mother and I was a bottle baby.
The patient says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!"
If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?