Raising kids may be a thankless job with ridiculous hours, but at least the pay sucks.

There's something that's really fun about the challenge of making the mundane funny, too, I think.

I don't want to get involved in the culture war. Religion's iffy.

I recently bought extreme chunky peanut butter. I opened it up.. .it was just peanuts. Wow that is extreme!

My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.

I'm closer to Bob Newhart than Rodney Dangerfield.

Boutique hotels are great, but they get too cute. Some hotels have shoe polish. It's like, come on, this isn't 1960. No one's polishing their shoes.