I live near a remedial school. There is a sign that says, slow... children. That can't be good for their self esteem. But look of course on the positive side, they can't read it.

Let's face it, the gene pool needs a little chlorine.

A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'

I'm not being condescending, I'm too busy thinking about far more important things you wouldn't understand.

I think they got it wrong with Saddam Hussein. They thought he had the A-Bomb. Instead he had a bomb.

I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.

People with Tourettes.....What makes them tick?