You know it's time to start using mouthwash when your dentist leaves the room and sends in a canary.

I think it was Cosby who also said to me, 'If only 2 percent of the world thinks you're funny, you'll still fill stadiums for the rest of your life.'

Anyone that says looks don't count is lying.

keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.

When you first get married, they open the car door for you. Eighteen years now...once he opened the car door for me in the last four years - we were on the freeway at the time.

Since I met him ten years ago there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of George Burns. And I didn't think of him again today.

I think actual death will be a lot easier than dying on stage. Cause - you know - if you do [actual death] right, you can go looking good. Maybe with a little quip [like]: 'I loved everybody.' But dying on stage...Oh, God!