Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.

Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest.

Congratulations, Congress! 77% disapproval rating! You may be about to become the English language's most offensive C-word.

Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing.

Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels.

I was definitely prepared for it to be slower, and it has not worked out that way in any shape or form. I'm grateful as a comedian, and slightly demoralized, occasionally, as a human being - those two things are always very different.

Mr. President, no one is saying you broke any laws, we're just saying it's a little bit weird you didn't have to.