Make your goal to attend to your underlying needs and to aim for a resolution so satisfying that everyone involved has their needs met also.

When we are angry, killing people is too superficial.

Ask before offering advice or reassurance.

Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.

In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.

Postpone result/solution thinking until later; it's through connection that solutions materialize - empathy before education.

When I am angry I have a judgment and an unmet need.