I think how tan a person is, is directly proportionate to how dumb they are.
Do they give Pulitzers for tweets yet?
Make a sex tape, upload it, get on a reality show, release a perfume, retire. That's the new American dream.
Having a baby is like a DUI from the universe.
My friends who have babies can't do anything. You can't go out at night. Having a baby is like a DUI from the universe.
Bragging that you had sex with a prostitute is like bragging that you got Doritos out of a vending machine.