Joseph Cotten, who said, You know how I got my name? Sammy Davis picked it for me. Never got a dinner!

Moses, who said when the Red Sea parted, What the hell was that? I was just going in for a dip! Never got a dinner!

The captain of the Titanic, who said to room service, Who sent for all this ice? Never got a dinner!

Bluebeard, who said to Scottland Yard, How do I know how many wives I've killed? I'm not an accountant! Never got a dinner!

Vincent Van Gogh, who said to the hat salesman, I like it, but it keeps sliding over my ear. Never got a dinner!

Jacques Cousteau, the last man to see Jimmy Hoffa. Never got a dinner!

Moses, who said to the children of Israel, Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before. Never got a dinner!