I don't get no respect. I called Suicide Prevention. They tried to talk me into it.
My dog learned how to beg by watching me through the bedroom door.
Steak and sex, my favorite pair. I get them both very rare.
I'd like to get some new clothes, but I can't find a Big and Short store.
Oh, when I was a kid, I was poor. Christmas, I got no presents. Well, there was one Christmas, on our front lawn - Prancer and Dancer - they dropped off a little something.
The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!