The reason that so many of us cannot save money is because of our friends. They're always buying something we can't afford.

Parents who wonder where the younger generation is going should remember where it came from.

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.

The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists.

Nobody's too fat - they're just too short.

Two things help to keep one's job. First, let the boss think he's having his own way. Second, let him have it.

President Herbert Hoover returned his salary to the government. His idea caught on, and now we're all doing it.