It's hard to swallow your pride. That's why I slather mine in mayonnaise.

The more you know, the sadder you get.

The Yankees' Facebook page was hacked. The hacker was immediately purchased and signed to a 5 year contract with the Yankees.

I guess 14% plus Jesus equals victory

New study reveals men like to cuddle. Another study reveals men will say anything to get into bed with a woman.

Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)

Oops! I always thought PETA stood for Please Eat This Animal.