Allyson Smith reminds me of a younger, prettier, funnier me. Now if you'll excuse me, the ladies from my bridge club have arrived.

My dad has a weird hobby; he collects empty bottles... which sounds so much better than "alcoholic."

You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks.

I quit my job at the helium gas factory. I didn't like being spoken to in that voice.

Allyson Smith reminds me of a younger, prettier, funnier me. Now if you'll excuse me, the ladies from my bridge club have arrived.

I went to a Karaoke Bar last night that didn't play any 70s music, at first I was afriad, oh I was petrified

So what if I cant spell Armageddon, its not the end of the world.