Being gay is harder than being black. I didn't have to come out black. I didn't have to tell my parents about what its like to be black.

I was really gifted at being able to construct a joke, but it's like they weren't even memorable, my first jokes, because they were so about nothing.

A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.

It's hard to get fired from the government. You have to, like, kill people.

To me, political office should be like jury duty. You should just get a notice in the mail one day and say, 'Aw, sh - , I'm secretary of state next month.

I like doing a bunch of different things, being all over the place.

I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too.