Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.

A driving range is the place where golfers go to get all the good shots out of their system.

Garden: One of a vast number of free outdoor restaurants operated by charity-minded amateurs in an effort to provide healthful, balanced meals for insects, birds and animals.

The true definition of a perennial: Any plant which, had it lived, would have bloomed year after year.

Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again.

Advice to anglers: don't take advice from people with missing fingers.

It's often necessary to hit a second shot to really appreciate the first one.