You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.

You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.

You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.

You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.

You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.

I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.

You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!